A Day in Our Shoes - Homeless LGBT Youth

The Best Gift You Can Give Yourself

The holidays don't have to be all about giving expensive gifts. Turn off some of the holiday stress and rediscover the true meaning of the holidays


The Best Gift You Can Give Yourself

Bullying Has To Stop!

It is important to know that bullying in any shape, from , or size is not acceptable.  Sometimes the best place to start is with ourselves.  After watching this video, can you commit to bringing and end to bullying in your world.

I hope so

Jamey Rodemeyer's Sister Taunted At School Dance

The Darkness of Teen Depression

Being around a teen who is deep in depression can be hard. But sometimes just being there can be enough.



The Darkness of Teen Depression

Alone to Lonely: The Deceptive Journey

Some days seem harder than others especially when you feel like you are all alone. Their is a fine line between being alone, which can be cool, to being lonely, which can be tough.


Alone to Lonely: The Deceptive Journey

Exercise: The Prescription to Change Your Mood

Even as the days get hot during the summer it is vital to get outside and exercise. Not just for your physical well being but also as a way to enhance your mood. One of the best prescriptions to fight off depression and anxiety is getting out into the sun and committing to moderate amounts of exercise on a daily basis. You don't have to train for a marathon but even 20 - 30 minutes of exercise can elevate body chemistry and lift you out of the darkness of depression and the stress of constant anxiety.

Exercise: The Prescription to Change Your Mood

Don't Be So Afraid!

I was watching The Glee Project the other day and was amazed at how open the kids are on the show expressing their affection for each other.  I am not talking about expressing their sexuality, which they are open about as well, but about the ability to openly share how much they care for each other through physical expression.

These kids, who are hoping to get a spot on the next season of Glee, hug each other, lean on each other, hang out on the sofa draped all over each other with no sense of shame or fear.

Is it possible that we are approaching a new age where people can be more open about the physical expression of caring for each other?  

I for one would be a big fan of this movement.  I feel as if too much time is spent worrying about appearing a certain way because you are openly affectionate.  Why not drop the barriers, drop the pretense, and openly share our physical affection toward each other.

Intimacy is a big risk but the pay off is worth it.

Hug somebody you care about today.

Here is a cool video that expresses how much fun hugging can be!

You Don't Have To Be Angry All The Time!

In any moment that involves the presence of intense emotion, you have a choice.

You can mirror the rage, anger, sarcasm, or cruelty of the people being hurtful to you or you can choose to remain centered and cool.

You don't need to constantly be fighting back and being cruel to others, instead you can choose a path of peace and self-reliance. When choosing this path, mean people don't know how to respond and will often get very quiet and walk away.

It is so easy to carry around thoughts of fear and anger that affect the way you interact with the world. At many times during the day you may find yourself challenged by mean words, taunting, teasing, and even bullying: causing you to live in a permanent cycle of fight or flight.

It is a constant low-level fear, which we often describe simply as stress.

This stress manifests itself not only in your emotional response, but also in your body, affecting your physical health.

By learning to pay attention. mindfulness and equanimity can help you balance your emotions and melt away the layers of stress that wreak havoc on minds, bodies and relationships.

Check out www.JohnSovec.com to learn some ways to meditate and let go

Anger: Fast and Furious!

Every day we have a choice to explode and be angry to the people we met in life or to stay present in a situation and react as a centered person.
Anger steal so much of our life energy that perhaps it is time to choose a different approach.


Anger: Fast and Furious!

Growing Things

Some days we have to challenge our selves to grow, even if it is just a little. And sometimes we need the help of a friend, a guide, or a therapist to walk with us along the way.

Growing Things

Ripening Your Dreams

Just like a fine wine, we need to nurture our dreams and let them mature into reality. In therapy, we uncover what those dreams are and then learn to trust the process of making those dreams and goals become a reality.


Ripening Your Dreams

There is Hope

It is so easy to feel lost an alone as a LGBT person in this crazy mixed up world of ours.  And yet every once in a while you get to witness how amazing people really are.  Please watch this video and share with others to learn the true meaning of tolerance and humanity.

An Experiment in Texas

I suddenly feel like there is some hope in this world!

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Seven

Every day we breathe in and we breathe out.
This wonderful life sustaining rhythm is one of the key focal points for a simple and powerful form of meditation that can reduce stress and relieve anxiety.


Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Seven

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Six

It's amazing how your outlook on life can effect how you experience your life. A little optimism can go a long way in the battle against stress and anxiety.

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Six

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Five

As you leave work today, notice how much noise and stimulus surround you on your commute home. All of this noise contributes to your daily stress levels.
But there is something you can do about all of this stress and anxiety...

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Five

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Four

It's amazing how many people try to bottle everything up and hide their thoughts and feelings from the world. This is a huge cause of the stress and anxiety that builds up in many peoples lives. Yet talking things out can really have a huge impact on our ability to release and reduce stress.


Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Four

No Bullying

It can be really scary going to school each day feeling different and as if you don't fit in.  The fear of someone yelling out " Faggot!" or pushing you into a locker.  Even overhearing someone saying " that's so gay" and worrying that they might be saying something about you.

Being bullied is scary. No one has the right to bully you.

It is important to find your allies, people who make you feel safe, so that you can be okay during the day.

For me this video says it all.

Stand Up! - Don't Stand for Homophobic Bullying

Find people who will stand up for you.

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Three

We work so hard trying to keep our heads above water that we sometimes forget how to play.


Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Three

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Two

Did you ever think about how much caffeine you ingest in one day? It may be more than you think and caffeine can radically effect you ability to handle stress and anxiety.
Explore this helpful tool to reduce caffeine and reduce stress.

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day Two

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day One

Is stress taking over your life?
Join me for the next seven days as I share practical tools for reducing stress and anxiety in your life.

Seven Days to Reducing Stress: Day One

I know I share a lot of methods on meditation and relaxation but sometimes it is the simple tasks of daily life that can bring us back to our center.

For me the task is cooking. When I cook I find that my mind and body relax and I move into a zone where it is all about the ingredients and the process of bringing them together in harmony.

What simple task brings you peace?

Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall

When was the last time you took a good look at yourself? By looking at the reflections in the eyes of the people in our lives we can take a deep journey inward to learn more about ourselves.
Therapy and counseling are are great tools to find out who you are and how you want to be in your world

Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall

March Newsletter

It's time to talk about change. It is something that is always happening and by opening our awareness to the process, amazing things can happen.
Take a look!

An Apple a Day...

If you are what you eat, does what you eat also effect your mood and energy? Does eating influence anxiety and depression. Do we sometimes get angry at our spouse because we haven't eaten all day?

You Bet!

By paying attention to eating well and in a timely manner we can make huge changes in how we feel each day.

An Apple a Day...:

Where to Find Love on Valentines Day

"To love oneself is the beginning of a life long affair" Oscar Wilde.

And no truer words could be spoken on Valentines Day where there is so much pressure to prove one's love to others and the world. Do we have it wrong trying to make love an external process rather than focusing on the inner process of self love?

When we put love into a bigger picture the one person that will be with you your entire life is, well, you. While other types of love, family, friends, partners, spouses, may come and go, finding a deep internal sense of loving oneself can create peace in our thoughts and emotions.

Being willing to let go of the negative voices that dominate many of our thoughts and instead focusing on our strengths and good qualities can bring a truer sense of self into the picture and allow us to be comfotable with our own company.

And the amazing bonus of this way of being is that the more we are able to love ourselves the more love we have to share with the world.

So for this Valentines Day, change your priorities; be loving and kind to yourself and notice how much more beautiful the world becomes.

Valentines Day, A Different Look

That magic day is here when chocolates are sent, flowers delivered, and cards filled with poems of love and longing are shared.

But there is another way to find love and that is to follow the path of nurturing yourself.


Valentines Day, A Different Look: "- Sent using Google Toolbar"

Normal is Soooo 1980's

It's never easy being different.  A lot of people say they just want to be normal. I say no.

Normal is beige.

Normal is boring.

Normal is fitting in with what everybody else is doing.

What about instead being okay with different, embracing it, and letting go of the fear to state who you are in the world.

Maybe not everybody is ready to take this step, maybe not all people are ready to see it, but somehow eventually we need to become comfortable with who we are and find the willingness to live in that space.

Share a little bit more of who you are today with someone you trust and see how it goes. Little steps to start can make big change.

Intuition: Finding the Wisdom Within

We know what we want to do. We know what we should do. But sometimes we get distracted and find ourselves lost in the wilderness of our thoughts.
Go quiet!
Go inside!
Rediscover you intuition.

Intuition: Finding the Wisdom Within

Even Teens Can Test Positive

One of the scariest moments in any gay persons life is going in to get an HIV test. It can be motivated by a questionable sexual encounter, or part of a regular 6 month testing regimen, or it can even be going along to support a friend who is getting tested.

But then results come back positive and your brain goes into overdrive. Now what?

The first thing is to slow down. You will have lots of thoughts and questions about the future, medical needs, telling people or not, and wondering how and why did this happen to me. These high levels of anxiety are normal at this moment. Feelings of fear, shock, panic, horror, shame, blame, hopelessness, anger, and disgust can go swirling through your mind. This whirlwind energy does not put us in the best position to make wise and rational decisions. So, once again, slow down.

As you start to get your bearings again, it may be advantageous to find a trusted friend or a therapist who specializes in LGBT issues including HIV. This person can become the reasonable caring voice that will help you through this challenging time. This individual doesn’t need to provide all the answers but it is important for you to know that you have a safety net where all of your fears can be spoken out loud and you can access an objective perspective to help direct you toward rational and healthy choices.

Next, you will want to connect with a medical doctor who specializes in HIV care who can become your primary physician. Ask lots of questions and know that no question is too stupid or too small. You need information to assist you in focusing on your best health care. Make sure that your doctor takes the time to answer your questions and that you have a comfortable working relationship so that you can honestly and openly address the sensitive issues you’ll face as you explore treatment. If you are not satisfied with your doctor, you can choose to find a different one who is more informed and sympathetic to your needs. Remember you always have the choice.

Online resources can also help, such as TheBody.com, one of the best and most complete sources of HIV/AIDS information from people in the forefront of the battle against this disease. The Center for Disease Control and the Mayo Clinic are also excellent resources for factual information. There are many other sites on the web but you need to be careful sorting out which information is based on scientific studies and which are more rumor and baseless health fads.

Finally, make sure that you continue getting emotional support with a therapist who specializes in LGBT issues. This is not a time to go it alone. The assistance of a good therapist can ease your anxiety and also help you through the many challenges that arise when facing this disease. Many local Gay and Lesbian Community Centers provide information and support along with an organization called The Life Group LA, which provides support groups and empowerment weekends for those infected andaffected by HIV/AIDS.

Use your resources wisely and know that there is an abundance of support out there to help you on this journey. As you begin to make sense of this experience and find personal meaning, the path will begin to unfold as you learn to live with HIV.

Even Teens Can Test Positive

One of the scariest moments in any gay persons life is going in to get an HIV test. It can be motivated by a questionable sexual encounter, or part of a regular 6 month testing regimen, or it can even be going along to support a friend who is getting tested.

But then results come back positive and your brain goes into overdrive. Now what?

The first thing is to slow down. You will have lots of thoughts and questions about the future, medical needs, telling people or not, and wondering how and why did this happen to me. These high levels of anxiety are normal at this moment. Feelings of fear, shock, panic, horror, shame, blame, hopelessness, anger, and disgust can go swirling through your mind. This whirlwind energy does not put us in the best position to make wise and rational decisions. So, once again, slow down.

As you start to get your bearings again, it may be advantageous to find a trusted friend or a therapist who specializes in LGBT issues including HIV. This person can become the reasonable caring voice that will help you through this challenging time. This individual doesn’t need to provide all the answers but it is important for you to know that you have a safety net where all of your fears can be spoken out loud and you can access an objective perspective to help direct you toward rational and healthy choices.

Next, you will want to connect with a medical doctor who specializes in HIV care who can become your primary physician. Ask lots of questions and know that no question is too stupid or too small. You need information to assist you in focusing on your best health care. Make sure that your doctor takes the time to answer your questions and that you have a comfortable working relationship so that you can honestly and openly address the sensitive issues you’ll face as you explore treatment. If you are not satisfied with your doctor, you can choose to find a different one who is more informed and sympathetic to your needs. Remember you always have the choice.

Online resources can also help, such as TheBody.com, one of the best and most complete sources of HIV/AIDS information from people in the forefront of the battle against this disease. The Center for Disease Control and the Mayo Clinic are also excellent resources for factual information. There are many other sites on the web but you need to be careful sorting out which information is based on scientific studies and which are more rumor and baseless health fads.

Finally, make sure that you continue getting emotional support with a therapist who specializes in LGBT issues. This is not a time to go it alone. The assistance of a good therapist can ease your anxiety and also help you through the many challenges that arise when facing this disease. Many local Gay and Lesbian Community Centers provide information and support along with an organization called The Life Group LA, which provides support groups and empowerment weekends for those infected andaffected by HIV/AIDS.

Use your resources wisely and know that there is an abundance of support out there to help you on this journey. As you begin to make sense of this experience and find personal meaning, the path will begin to unfold as you learn to live with HIV.

Finding the Spirit of Adventure

The age old question of "What should we do this weekend?" sometimes seems more like a chore than an invitation. But sometimes the biggest adventures are right outside.
We just have to open that door.

Finding the Spirit of Adventure

Quieting Anxiety

You now that voice inside your head that screams at you when things go crazy in your life. Guess What? You don't have to listen to it.
Learn to recognize the early signs of stress and anxiety in your body and you can quiet the voice in your brain.

Quieting Anxiety

Don't Let Them Get You Down

When people are mean to us, what do we do.  We can get angry, we can feel hurt, we can even want to get revenge. Or... we could let go of the anger and fear, maybe even recognizing the huge amounts of pain and hurt our opponent is carrying, and take care of ourselves.

Rather than giving in to fear, bring more loving kindness into the world that surrounds you. Increase your gift of gentle loving energy into the world, pushing against the fear and hurt that is surrounding us on all fronts. Don't give into the pain, overcome it and become a stronger more beautiful version of you.

 

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Creating Ourselves

There seems to be so much fear about making mistakes, but what if that time was an opportunity to change and grow.
There are many ways to find the beauty in any moment. Searching for the light in even the darkest moments creates a beacon that leads us to fuller and more realized versions of ourselves.


Creating Ourselves